Today is Baal Divas or the Children’s Day, the birthday of Pandit Jawahar Lal Nehru who loved children very much. A lot is written every year on this day and otherwise too regarding the issues of child-labour, child-abuse and children’s problems which are never resolved despite celebration of this day year-by-year. However today, I am saying something else based upon my own experiences as a child.
A child has sentiments or feelings the same way as an adult has. However the problem of a child is that very less people understand them or even sincerely try to understand them. And when he / she is hurt, the greater pain than that of due to that hurting is that his / her pain is not understood by them whom he / she considers as his / her own.
A child’s heart is much more delicate and sensitive than that of an adult and childhood is the stage when the personality of an individual takes shape. The child is just like the loose clay which is shaped by his life-experiences and his fostering. Once shaped properly, it is bound to be more or less the same throughout the life. If the shape is defective, the child becomes a life-time sufferer. It’s a fact which is to be understood by the people surrounding him.
A child is always trusting. He / she believes whatever is said to him / her or promised to him / her. And perhaps because of this fact only, a child is the most betrayed one too in most of the cases. Lies are told to the children because they believe them, promises are made to them never to be fulfilled because the objective of the concerned adult (s) is solved at that time because of those promises. What happens when either the promise is not fulfilled or the child comes to know that a lie had been spoken to him / her ? His / her heart breaks without a sound. He / she starts learning and understanding that the adults are liars. A child perceives the world through his / her experiences only which accumulate within him / her and form the final constellation of personality-traits in him / her. Let this painful experience happen three or four times and the opportunity to develop a good citizen or a good human-being is lost. But how many adults care for it ?
I had a miserable childhood and due to the surrounding adults, I could never grow-up properly as a so-called mature adult which is called in Indian lingo – Duniyadaar (a person having practical knowledge of this world). I know how much it hurts when false promises are made or lies are spoken or delicate feelings are struck at; and how a pain is exaggerated by the useless talks and comments of the people who speak in a way as to add insult to injury or make the child feel time and again that he / she is a kid only who can be cajoled by smart-talk without doing anything concrete for him / her.
Within my heart, I am still a child and that’s why I relate more to the children than to the adults. Being father of two children, I try my level best never to make false promises to them and take care of their feelings. There are several occasions when a child is hurt. At that time he / she needs the genuine support of his / her family members which cannot be given by unnecessary talks, comments or sermons. Not everybody knows how to apply ointment to an inner wound and help healing it. Let’s learn it. Let’s not allow the small hurt to develop into a canker which can never be healed and may spoil the whole life of the erstwhile kid.
My life-principle is – ‘Never break a heart, especially when it is of a child’.
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